“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for wholeness and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11
I was grieving the death of the dream that I had for Luke, but since then, I’ve started learning to embrace a new dream for him – God’s dream. God’s dream for Luke is indestructible. There is no disorder, illness, disaster or circumstance that can derail it. It is unaffected by social status, wealth or IQ. God’s dream is inevitable, it is without limitation, and it is lovingly planned.
Embracing God’s dream does not mean I am giving up hope that my prayers will be answered. I still pray daily that my son will be healed from autism, and I invest every resource at my disposal to that end, but I also try to remember that God’s dream for Luke is infinitely more glorious than mine ever could be. My role is to teach Luke to know God to the best of his ability, whatever that level is, and to have faith that this trial is for Luke’s ultimate good.
I’m not there yet. Some days are harder than others, but I have gotten to the point that I can have a better perspective on those words spoken to me a year-and-a-half ago. I was driving in my car one afternoon when my thoughts stumbled into thinking about what my response would be if God asked me, “What did you do for Me with the time I gave you?” and then I thought about what Luke’s response might be, “Other people are better people because of me.” It suddenly struck me. That’s a really good answer! There is no higher calling or greater purpose than causing others to glorify God with their lives. Uniquely designed people accomplish this calling naturally. It’s built in! Yet, the rest of us must strive for it. I should be honored that my son has such a noble purpose. I should endeavor to make it my own.